Have you ever tried to help and ended up the bad guy?
Yvonne got kicked out of an event for giving feedback she thought was welcome. What followed was a real-time lesson in intent versus impact, the Karpman Drama Triangle, and why our best intentions sometimes cause the most damage.
In this episode, Yvonne and her coach Matthew Riven break down what actually happened, where the communication ruptured, and what it looks like to stay in your adult when everything in you wants to react.
If you have ever been misunderstood when you were trying to help, or spiraled over something someone said that they claim was no big deal, this one is for you.
What you will take away:
- Why intent and impact are almost never the same thing, and what to do about it
- How the drama triangle shows up in business relationships without you realizing it
- The difference between rescuing and helping, and why it matters
- What it means to check out the fantasy instead of acting on it
- Why drama is always optional, even when it does not feel like it
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DISCLAIMER:
This podcast is sponsored by AskYvi.com. Some links are affiliate links which means if you buy something we'll receive a small commission.
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๐ Meet Matthew Riven
Website: https://stirinstitute.com/
DISCLAIMER:
This podcast is sponsored by AskYvi.com. Some links are affiliate links which means if you buy something we'll receive a small commission.
--------------
๐ Meet Matthew Riven
Website: https://stirinstitute.com/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/matthew.riven/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@MatthewRiven
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@matthew.riven
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@MatthewRiven
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@matthew.riven
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๐Connect with Yvi
https://instagram.com/askyvi
https://www.facebook.com/AskYvi/
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๐ Highlights ๐
00:00 | Introduction
00:35 | Why intent vs impact matters
01:54 | When is it okay to offer help? Setting the stage with Matthew Riven
02:31 | The full story: giving feedback and getting kicked out of an event
04:50 | The logistics problem: why unclear event locations hurt attendees
07:50 | The Karpman Drama Triangle explained
11:55 | Rupture and repair: what to do when communication breaks down
14:48 | Drama is optional
16:53 | Intent vs impact in real life
20:48 | What is a "fantasy" in communication and why you need to check it out
24:42 | The right way to start a hard conversation
28:49 | Why "no emotions at work" is bad leadership and bad research
30:35 | Building a workplace culture where emotions are safe
35:15 | Managing people through change vs managing them out
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powered by ecamm: https://askyvi.tips/ecamm
and Transistor.fm : https://askyvi.tips/transistorfm
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Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SheIsALeader
Subscribe to Podcast: https://askyvi.tips/podcast
Apply to be a guest: https://askyvi.tips/pod-SIAL
Proud member of the podmatch network
๐Connect with Yvi
https://instagram.com/askyvi
https://www.facebook.com/AskYvi/
--------------
๐ Highlights ๐
00:00 | Introduction
00:35 | Why intent vs impact matters
01:54 | When is it okay to offer help? Setting the stage with Matthew Riven
02:31 | The full story: giving feedback and getting kicked out of an event
04:50 | The logistics problem: why unclear event locations hurt attendees
07:50 | The Karpman Drama Triangle explained
11:55 | Rupture and repair: what to do when communication breaks down
14:48 | Drama is optional
16:53 | Intent vs impact in real life
20:48 | What is a "fantasy" in communication and why you need to check it out
24:42 | The right way to start a hard conversation
28:49 | Why "no emotions at work" is bad leadership and bad research
30:35 | Building a workplace culture where emotions are safe
35:15 | Managing people through change vs managing them out
--------------
powered by ecamm: https://askyvi.tips/ecamm
and Transistor.fm : https://askyvi.tips/transistorfm
--------------
Subscribe on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SheIsALeader
Subscribe to Podcast: https://askyvi.tips/podcast
Apply to be a guest: https://askyvi.tips/pod-SIAL
Proud member of the podmatch network